If you're going crazy, do you actually know that you're going crazy? Cause I'm pretty sure the men in my life are trying to send me to the nice place with the padded rooms and straight jackets. The Hubby and I have been separated for exactly one year tomorrow. To say it's been an interesting year is an understatement. I have gone from absolutely hating his guts, to mild disgust, to numbness, to grudging acceptance that he's breathing my air, to feeling like he wouldn't be the first person that I'd sacrifice in the event of a zombie apocalypse. I can cycle through this range of emotions in the span of a day. Don't get me wrong, he's not an evil person. I definitely wouldn't refer to him as the devil incarnate or anything, but our relationship seriously has issues. Currently, we are working on being friends and parents. That's our goal. Or, that's my goal at least. His goal is to renew our I Do's. We do have a 20 year history. I'm sure I'll get around to writing about that later.
Then we have the Boyfriend. The way I sum that one up, is he's young and he's still learning. Now again, don't get me wrong here, he's great and he's come such a long way in the short time that we've been together. But he's very jealous and territorial where the Hubby is concerned. I'm no supermodel and I think they're both out of their minds and may need their eyes checked, but hey, to each their own. Now because of the kids and the practically life long history we have, Hubby is around a lot. And he's not just playing with the kids the entire time. I guess we do slip back into the married couple routines sometimes, talking about our days and such but hell, we've been doing that since we were kids. I do put him in his place when I feel it's needed. I even go as far as to separate myself and go hide out in my room for awhile so that I'm totally out of the equation. It kinda gives me a bit of a timeout anyways.
The biggest issue in this dysfunctional little group, is the family style way I want my children raised. I didn't grow up with two loving parents that I could spend time with and have holidays and lots of ewwy gooy special memories. Far from it. But again, a post for another time. The point is, no matter what the issues are between the Hubby and myself, we agree on the importance of showing a united front to our kids, not arguing in front of them, (although he does need numerous death stares to remind him of this from time to time), and still doing things as a family unit. So we randomly take them on outings together. It's always a good time and we both feel it's really important for the kids to have these memories.
Now the Boyfriend does agree that these things are important for the kids to a point, but his tolerance for it does not stretch very far. There is generally quite a bit of pouting to deal with when we get home. It's even worse when the Hubby and I go out without the kids for things like birthday shopping. And as weird as it may sound, when I'm not begrudging him breathing the same air as me and we're getting along, I actually still enjoy his company. So I spend quite a bit of my time trying to figure out and balance what is an appropriate and acceptable amount of time to spend with the Hubby and when to tell each of the men in my life to shove it.
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